Sidebar My life, according to me: omg- i cant believe that THIS is my life

My life, according to me

well, im 16, i live in canada, and my life is VERY complicated. I like to write, but my thoughts come out of my head to fast for me to write them down, otherwise, I'd keep a regular journal. No one I know has this address, so I tell it like it is... no holding back. Hmmm i guess this is my life, eh?

Monday, July 24, 2006

omg- i cant believe that THIS is my life

you know what? i think i think too much. I mess up things that way- or do i see the inevedible that way- and save myself from unessasary pain? i don't know- but I DO know that i will think about it. My last boyfriend uuuurggghhh. I really don't even want to get started!!! We went out for 6 months- which i feel was 7 months too long! and never once did he hold my hand in public, let alone kiss me in public. No one knew we were dating (except, me him our parents and my best friend) and my best friend only knew because i told her!!!! In the beginning, i was like 'let's not tell anybody' cuz, you know how high school kids are 'oooh, so how's you know who...' 'oh, where's what's her face...' and that's not what we needed. Relation ships are already hard, without having to deal with people screwing with your heads. Anyway, after dating for 5 months i asked him why he never acknoleged me in public. He told me he never knew he was supposed to (I know i know) i wanted to slap him in the face. He lies like a rug. ANYWAY... moving on, i told him, well, you're not embarrased of me, are you? he said no (LIAR) I said, you're not ashamed of me, are you , he said , no (LIAR). Well, then i couldn't see the problem. I'm .. i don't know. I don't think very highly of myself. I have some guys liking me. Why? I have no effing idea. I ask, they say they don't know, they just do, which, believe me, dosen't feel very good. So, I figure i was just some ass- which by the way he didn't get very much of (ha ha ha). And i don't know, i still feel kinda crappy about it. BLAH. screw him


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